Saturday, October 29, 2016

I had way more sexual energy

As a boy and young man, I had way more sexual energy than I knew what to do with. I had endless crushes on girls and masturbated three times a day. Eventually I realized that all my obsessing about sex wasn’t enhancing my life. I wanted to control this incredibly strong urge instead of having it control me and so I started exploring various spiritual practices, including kundalini yoga.

Eventually my path brought me to a Daoist, Mantak Chia. As a young man, he had been told that his sexual energy was exhausted and he would die if he didn’t do something about it. He learned non-ejaculatory orgasm as a way to heal himself. Thus, we had different but parallel paths. His sexual energy was depleted and mine was excessive, but we both had a sexual energy problem, and we both healed ourselves by practicing non-ejaculatory orgasm.

We were men on a non-emission.

Mantak Chia’s English wasn’t good. I ended up writing his first seven books. Taoist Secrets of Love: Cultivating Male Sexual Energy sold hundreds of thousands of copies and propelled him to fame.

I’ve evolved my teaching of non-ejaculatory orgasm beyond what Mantak taught me, as I found Westerners need to do important emotional clearing work to be truly successful in the practice. My preferred methods involve the Six Healing Sounds and emotional alchemy, known to Daoists as Fusion of the Five Elements. The Healing Sounds use acupuncture channels with sound and arm movements to release trapped emotional energy in our vital organs that can block the flow of sexual energy. (I discuss Fusion of the Five Elements below.)

When we practice non-ejaculatory orgasm, we’re practicing energy manage­ment. Not energy as in petroleum or electricity, but energy as in the mysterious, ineffable force that underlies everything and moves through us all. Learn about Semenax at and

The Chinese focus on energy first and matter second. The Chinese word for energy is chi (also spelled qi, both pronounced chee). This chi flow, or life force, is the root of what make us feel alive. It’s totally embedded in the Chinese language. A friend of mine counted 647 words in his Chinese dictionary that integrate the character for chi. The word for garlic translates as ‘hot chi.’ The word for weather is ‘atmospheric chi.’

In Western culture, we pay much less attention to energy. We’re more focused on the level that vibrates more slowly—the physical body. But it’s energy that creates the body, and it’s energy that makes a body feel well or ill, sexy or ugly and unloved.

In the Daoist view, there’s nothing esoteric or mystical about chi. It’s understood for what it is, as what precedes and underlies all manifestations into form. Everything that exists, from rocks to people to planets, is vibrating with energy.

There’s chi in our thoughts, feelings and perceptions as well as in our physical selves. Someone insults us and we feel angry. Anger has its own unique quality of energy—we all know what it feels like. When we do a practice like qigong or tai chi, we’re working with the energy that underlies those thoughts, feelings and perceptions. We’re creating the possibility of rewriting our habitual scripts. We’re tinkering with our energetic DNA. Daoist methods of energy management can help us transmute this anger into compassion and love.

. . . And It’s About Sex

For Daoists, everything is sexual. I don’t mean this in the Western sense of being randy. The Daoist view of sex is premised in observation, not arousal. They observe nature and see a profoundly sexual process, with the entire universe emerging out of a marriage between the male principle, yang, and the female principle, yin.

The Daoist view is that the entire universe is in a constant state of sexual procreation. Behind the world of visible form, there is a formless world. Formless energies are polarized into male (yang) and female (yin) aspects, and it is their sexual commingling that creates the world of form. Light and shadow, solar and lunar, penetrating and receptive—these are some of the polarities that shape the world.

Imagine a baby before it’s born. It’s pure potential; it doesn’t exist yet. It takes a male sperm and a female egg to turn that potential into something physical. Everything in the universe is created the same way. Masculine and feminine transform the formless into form.

Our cells are always reproducing themselves—this is sexual. Our yin and yang aspects are constantly interacting on physical-sexual, emotional, mental, and spiritual levels. And just like the cosmos itself, we humans are constantly performing the sexual act of transmuting spirit into body, the formless into form.

In the Daoist view, we have an energy portal where this happens. Think of it as a Star Trek portal with a vapor lock in the middle. One door—the mingmen, or ‘gate of destiny’—is located between the two kidneys, at the level of our navel. The chi in the mingmen is formless, waiting to be born as both our body and our destiny. The other door is the dantian (“elixir field”). It’s located in the exact same space as the mingmen, only it holds the slower vibration of our physical essence.

The formless spiritual chi comes into the mingmen, where it becomes sexually polarized into the two forces of yin and yang. It then passes into the dantian and from there it creates your body through a network of acupuncture meridians. This is the energy that fuels you as you go through your life. It’s also the energy we work with when practicing non-ejaculatory orgasm.

All creation is sexual, and that sexual polarity is what connects us to everyone and everything.

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