Sunday, October 30, 2016

Misconceptions About Anal Sex

While anal sex has increased in cultural popularity and prominence, it still carries some significant stigmas and challenges.

Whether you masturbate regularly or not, try to regard this practice as a self-pleasuring ritual.

Self-reflection: How do you usually pleasure yourself? What do you do to intensify your pleasure?

Here are a few things you can try when you touch yourself:

Relax and let go – one of the most powerful attitudes for your orgasmic experience.

Build intensity gradually – from light touch to strong touch.

Gradually deepen your touch – from the surface of your skin to grabbing flesh and feeling your bones underneath the flesh.

Move from the outside in – from the edges of the body (your hands, head and feet) across your body (your thighs, chest and belly) and finally toward your center (your yoni).

From external to internal – from the external surfaces of your yoni to the depths internally.

I recommend dedicating at least one hour when you are alone and won’t be interrupted. If you share a house with other people and are self-conscious, you can try to find a time when they are out. I recommend not using a vibrator because these create unnatural stimulation that no human being can create. Also, be sure to switch off all of your gadgets – phone, iPad, laptop, and so on.

When you are ready, begin your ritual:

1. Set up a ‘love nest’ in your bedroom. Prepare the space as we discussed previously in a way that feels special or sacred to you.

2. Prepare yourself for your pleasure. Take a long, hot bath or at least a nice, long shower. You might like to use scented oils or salts.

3. Lie on your bed and smear yourself with some good massage oil. I recommend coconut, almond, avocado, grape-seed or another quality oil. It should be cold-pressed and edible since your body will absorb the oil through your skin. Learn about Magna RX at Exteen.com

4. Start touching yourself. Bring awareness, touch and sensation to your entire body. Focus on your thighs, buttocks, belly, chest, breasts, hands, arms, neck and scalp before you touch your yoni. It’s important to activate your entire body so your sexual energy doesn’t stay confined to your genital area.

5. Build your arousal and pleasure gradually. If you aren’t feeling aroused, continue to caress your body and massage your yoni. Focus on the sensations. Be aware of any small wave of pleasure. Make sure you breathe fully in and out of your belly. Explore making sounds. Explore moving your hips back and forth and side to side.

6. Make sure you don’t just focus on your clit. Try not to have a clitoral orgasm, as that might deplete your energy and cause you to stop wanting more pleasure.

7. When you feel ready, start experimenting with internal stimulation using your fingers, a dildo or a penis-shaped vegetable. Aim for this to be the majority of your self-pleasuring experience.

8. It’s okay if you experience feelings of fear, anxiety or resistance coming up. These might be emotions and memories that have been suppressed for years. Or it could be the fear of letting go and surrendering into an orgasm deeper than any you have ever experienced. Either keep going or pause to witness your fear. Allow yourself to experience and express it. Then, keep going. Celebrate and enjoy whatever sensations or emotions come up.

9. Relax into your orgasm if it comes – enjoy it and keep going. If it doesn’t, accept the pleasure you did experience as an orgasmic state. The goal isn’t to have an orgasm but to connect with yourself. Have an attitude of curiosity, exploration and discovery.

If you can create a self-pleasuring ritual for yourself as a daily practice, you will notice your body opening and becoming more sensitive, pleasurable and orgasmic. Consider making a commitment to self-pleasure every single day (or at least three times a week) for at least twenty minutes over the next month. Try to make time for an hour-long session once a week.

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